decision 2012
I just hit on a theory of presidential politics.
You've heard the Taller Candidate Theory; though that has been the case for most of our history, it's not infallible. Kerry lost to Bush in 2004. The War Hero theory? busted in both directions, multiple times. The Money Theory? tough to beat, but nonetheless busted (Ross Perot, anyone?). All must bow before Brake's Law of Cuddliness.
In the television age, the cuddlier candidate has always won. Period. Nixon, you say? Take a look at George McGovern. I didn't say the winner has to be actually cuddly; I said cuddlier. So, for instance, George Bush Sr doesn't particularly fit the description either, but he had the good fortune of running against Michael Dukakis.
Right down the line, folks. If the Republicans want a victory in 2012, forget the issues: they need someone (gulp) cuddlier than Barack Obama.
You've heard the Taller Candidate Theory; though that has been the case for most of our history, it's not infallible. Kerry lost to Bush in 2004. The War Hero theory? busted in both directions, multiple times. The Money Theory? tough to beat, but nonetheless busted (Ross Perot, anyone?). All must bow before Brake's Law of Cuddliness.
In the television age, the cuddlier candidate has always won. Period. Nixon, you say? Take a look at George McGovern. I didn't say the winner has to be actually cuddly; I said cuddlier. So, for instance, George Bush Sr doesn't particularly fit the description either, but he had the good fortune of running against Michael Dukakis.
Right down the line, folks. If the Republicans want a victory in 2012, forget the issues: they need someone (gulp) cuddlier than Barack Obama.
Comments
And since "cuddliness" is a completely subjective measurement, there's no way you can lose on this! :)
I have a corollary theory called "Jason's theory of unfalsifiable theories". Whether in baseball, superbowl picks, politics, or whatever, if you have a sufficient history to draw from, you can _always_ pick some obscure factoid that is correct.
The team that wears black on the first home game always wins. The largest shoe size loses if the primaries are held on an odd day. Whatever the anecdote du jour, it has always annoyed me when proponents of a certain outcome have trumpeted these historical non-facts as if just by saying them out loud they've somehow reinforced the viability of their side.
Conveniently, when it doesn't work, there's always another factoid from history to draw from. Ach!
(Erin just sottovoce'd "I don't know if I'll EVER understand guy humor..."