love and quarreling
Last night, there were two meetings at my church at the same time: one was the main Wednesday night meeting, the other was the youth thing in the chapel. I had duties at the youth one, while the grown-ups upstairs dealt with Charlie's resignation. I realized how happy I was to be in the meeting where there was praise and worship and a pretty good talk about Islam, and teenagers I love to be with. They're why I'm here. I'm not here for the incredible satisfaction of being a deacon, or being on all the committees. I'm here because I've got a job to do with them.
I've had a few people respond with alarm about Sunday's post. I'll clarify: I've said goodbye, as I should have a long time ago, to the Trinity I grew up in. It's not the same church, and I'm not the same person, and this isn't the same world. That allows me to be here in the present, and allows me to say that I'm not loyal to Charlie or Trinity, or even myself. I have a higher loyalty, and I'll serve it wherever it takes me.
I tend to think that if you don't have a lover's quarrel with your church every now and then, you might not be as much of a lover as you could. I've revised that thought in the face of Catherine's church, which seems miraculously free of the kind of maneuvering and frustration that other churches have. But it's a freedom that comes at an expense, too: I don't think I'd be satisfied with being involved only in her church family. At this point, I still enjoy what a traditional church provides.
Expensive, yes. But I'm trying to cut down on the emotional expenditures and stick with doing what I love to do, and what I feel God has gifted me to do for right now. For whatever reason, teenagers are as drawn to me as I am to them. I truly love exploring the rich rich tapestry that is the Scripture, and finding out how truly shocking and challenging it is. I love communicating that shock and challenge to people. I plan to do so as long as I'm needed.
And I'll enjoy it, too.
I've had a few people respond with alarm about Sunday's post. I'll clarify: I've said goodbye, as I should have a long time ago, to the Trinity I grew up in. It's not the same church, and I'm not the same person, and this isn't the same world. That allows me to be here in the present, and allows me to say that I'm not loyal to Charlie or Trinity, or even myself. I have a higher loyalty, and I'll serve it wherever it takes me.
I tend to think that if you don't have a lover's quarrel with your church every now and then, you might not be as much of a lover as you could. I've revised that thought in the face of Catherine's church, which seems miraculously free of the kind of maneuvering and frustration that other churches have. But it's a freedom that comes at an expense, too: I don't think I'd be satisfied with being involved only in her church family. At this point, I still enjoy what a traditional church provides.
Expensive, yes. But I'm trying to cut down on the emotional expenditures and stick with doing what I love to do, and what I feel God has gifted me to do for right now. For whatever reason, teenagers are as drawn to me as I am to them. I truly love exploring the rich rich tapestry that is the Scripture, and finding out how truly shocking and challenging it is. I love communicating that shock and challenge to people. I plan to do so as long as I'm needed.
And I'll enjoy it, too.
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